Flirting with Poly - Part 1
Flirting with Poly - Part 1
Some people I know have been with the same partner since school, literally, their first boyfriend at 14 or 15 that they married and had children with and lived happily ever after*.
(*Or so says social media)
But what about the people who have had multiple partners? Are they ‘less than’ those who have lifelong partnerships nailed?
Or the people who you know have had adulterous relationships, deliberating skirting the rules of relationships with in-clandestine encounters with one or another person.
But do you have anyone in your circle who has multiple partners? On purpose? And so does their significant other?!
What we’re talking about here is consensual non-monogamy. Otherwise known as ethical non-monogamy, open relationships, and sometimes even polyamory (the latter is slightly different from the other terms because open or ENM relationships are generall;y opened purely in a physical sense, the emotional bond and dynamic is still a two-person do.) And it can be a source of delight for some or a source of great fear and discomfort for others. There are so many things to talk into here, so here I go.
Poly derived from the Greek word for ‘many’
Amor derived from the Latin word for 'love'
~ the practice of engaging in multiple romantic (and typically sexual) relationships, with the consent of all the people involved.
Non-monogamy squicks some people out - this is my technical term - because it pulls on so many deep-rooted belief- and emotional attachment- systems, born from a variety of hugely impactful influences, namely societal, cultural, political and religious.
My question over the years is this; is monogamy a natural state? Are humans meant to be with just one (opposite-gendered) partner?
I am an anatomy geek and I feel certain that from an evolutionary perspective, this is why
there are millions of sperm in each male ejaculate
a male can impregnate many females in one go, although the human gestation period is nine months and a female can have only one pregnancy at a time
there is no refractory period after a female has experienced an orgasm and she can experience multi-orgasmic states
and natural increase of the hormones vasopressin and oxytocin post-orgasm generally causes the male to be tired, giving the female opportunity to gather more sperm
I am really broad-brushing with this post because I have plenty to say on the topic. If you’re a regular here, you will see more. In fact, I’ve split this post into two parts. The second part is coming soon and I’ll attach the link to the second part at the foot of this post - it gets super interesting!
If you’re new around here, you’ll see that my blog is steadily growing in content so I will be cross-referencing other blogs so you can keep yourself well-informed and lubed up, so do keep checking back in or save this post if you want to hear more about what I might say on topics.
I would LOVE to know if any of this information has been useful or if you have anything to share or add to the conversation - let me know!
with pleasure,
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