A Libido Dry Spell? Here’s How to Reignite Your Desire Naturally
A libido dry spell? Try spending time apart from your lover, doing the things that spark joy individually. Rekindling your own sparks is very attractive to the other person. This works for solo players, too!
Do you live in an abundant sexual oasis oozing and dripping with desire all the time, or does it ever dry up into a full-blown low libido moment that leaves your desire as dried up and barren as a camel's playground?
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What is a Libido Dry Spell, Really?
We talk about 'sex drive' all the time, but it really isn't a drive at all. Granted it's essential for the continuation of human beans but it's not actually a physical necessity for our imminent survival like water, food, and rest.
It's more like an appetite for sexual desire or contact - either with yourself or with another person.
And just like appetites, our libido or desire of sex can be high or low, depending on what's going on.
Interestingly, the more sex you have, the more interest you can have for it. Think of it like, out of sight, out of mind - if you're not getting the old bumpy-pumpy in the intimacy stakes, you can start to become less motivated for it.
If you fly solo, this is a great reason to make sure you keep up with your masturbation / self-love / wank practice - use the lingo that best suits you.
Keep it all pumping and flowing!
The Science of Sexual Desire
Differing libido levels - or desire discrepancies, as us sex geeks say - can cause problems in some partnered dynamics because let's face it, we're always going to have differing levels of interest in sex.
can cause problems
One of the best things you can do for your sex life is to get really fucking good at talking and communicating about it.
And I understand that this might be easier said than done.
(If you need me, I am really good at helping couples talk about doing the doodah.)
The second best thing is to give yourself a break.
Huh?
That's right.
If you have been in relationship for a while, taking some time apart can be really great for stimulating your libido.
No, I'm not selling you a one-way ticket to any divorce court, I'm telling you both to reconnect with your individual passions and interests to reignite the things that make you sparkle as your whole and complete self.
How to Reignite Your Libido. Without The Pressure!
The perfectly brilliant Esther Perel tells us, there is nothing sexier than seeing your lover in their flow doing something they love and vice versa.
It will remind you exactly of the reasons you fell in love with them. My husband is an amazing business person and also a DJ - which is how I met him in 2002 - when I see him doing what he does best, I’m flooded with all the feels for him because he shines. When he sees me dancing and performing burlesque, teaching a yoga class or speaking at an event (Fun fact: I love public speaking and empowering audiences through pleasure and confidence - it’s a passion I bring on stage just like I do in burlesque). I know it’s the same for him because I know that I shine.
These are times when I don’t notice the passage of time, my endless mind-chatter pauses and I feel alive.
And guess what? When I’ve been engaging in these things, my body feels infinitely more awake for receiving pleasure.
Reignite Desire & Boost Libido Naturally
So if you wonder how to reignite desire in a long-term relationship or how to increase libido naturally, here’s a question for YOU. What inspires these feelings in you? How can you incorporate more of it into your life to freshen up your pleasure receptors?
with pleasure,
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